as fleeting as time is

as fleeting as time is

What if several doctors diagnosed you with an incurable disease that only left with six months to live, what would you do with your dissipating time? Would you spend it with your loved ones? Would you finally get the courage to kiss that girl? Would you end your life now instead of having it drag on for months? Would saving for a rainy day even matter anymore? Currently there are 245 days 14 hours 53 mins and 47 seconds left in my time zone –EST and I plan to use them all up. Who knows what I’ll be doing but I know I’m definitely going to be doing them now. A good friend of mine, due to her recent layoff, decided to travel India for 6 months. She’s been on a holy journey of self discovery. I hope she truly finds herself and her passions. As for me, will it be a religious Mecca to India? Is traveling the desert more my style? Is living it up in the lap of luxury what I should be doing instead? I’m chasing dreams for the next 245 days 14 hours 50 mins and 33 seconds. I’m going to make sure I live like I only have six months to live because in the end do we really know how long we’ve got until it’s time to meet our maker. Below are a few of the things I’m planning on doing for the rest of my six months.

1- Join a protest and/or a picket line
2- Travel to the ends of the Earth
3- Trek the Amazon
4- Become closer to a spiritual being

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rapunzel! rapunzel! rapunzel!!!!

rapunzel! rapunzel! rapunzel!!!!

I have not deceived and yet I feel as if I have woven a very tangled web. In the midst of all my regular life stressors, I have managed to weave two love webs. Although I did not plan for any of them to happen, they have. Oh if there was only something I could do to magically wish them away. Poof be gone life stressor; poof, poof be gone individual who is too afraid to live without his mother; poof, poof, poof slobbery kisser individual; poof, poof, poof, poof, poof, poof, poof individuals who want me to give them my undivided attention. Where can I find the blue flying unicorn in the sky that can fly me off to the most remote places on Earth? Does the leprechaun know how to get to the desert? Is the wood nymph equipped for the arctic? Who among my fury and cutesy imagined creatures can I call upon to take me sailing through the seven seas? Oh Rapunzel, do you need company up in your tower?

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what now charlie brown?

what now charlie brown?

Whaw whaaw whawong whaw whawah wha is exactly what I hear when you speak. Wha whahwong whahah waong. It’s almost as if I was in an episode of Charlie Brown. Your stories are repetitive so I zone out. I don’t miss much that I know for sure. Even if you are sharing something new, I zone out. When you are sharing something personal or whatever it may be and the TV is on, please be aware that I am completely focused on the tube not you. Doesn’t my lack of eye contact give you signals that you are boring me? Isn’t my silence over the phone enough to tell you to pep up the speech? When you have something intelligible and intelligent to say, please do wake me up from my slumber. At this point, I could care less about your redecorating or your prospective business ventures. Obviously you were absent the day they taught your boys’ class how NOT to get a girl into bed with you. So for future reference, when trying to get a girl to sleep with you, don’t talk about your ex, your medical conditions as a child, your lighting venture or your mother. These topics will surely get you a thanks for playing and do be sure to pick up your consolation prize, a few more sexless years, when you leave. Next contestant!

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