morning commute

Thursday, July 23, 2009

morning commute

As I walk to work this morning, I notice familiar faces and garbs. It’s the same (more or less) young girls with their hairs tied up and the nude colored tights underneath their shorts. Ballerinas! The only difference with this morning is that I finally decide to question it. Why am I seeing so many ballerinas throughout the city? And every day! Yes, I see ballerinas throughout the city. I have no clue what they are doing but this morning I’m intrigued. I know of one studio location because I see a line wrapping around the block almost every morning; but every morning? I don’t get it. Why are there so many ballerinas this summer? Is there some sort of American Ballerina Idol training going on? Who knows but I’m intrigued. Have you ever walked through Union Square where the Farmer’s Market should be on a Tuesday and/or Thursday and noticed how big the area is? Have you ever noticed that it could be a scene in a movie? Have you ever noticed that as in many movies it is a perfect scene for a shootout? I guess it reminds me of the movie where the Russians or whoever they are is chasing this guy....what's the name of that movie...or other movies that have scenes in parks that when the pigeons fly away in a hurry you know there is going to be trouble. In any case, this is my morning commute. On certain days, it does involve quite a handful of hooting and hollering from construction workers; but, ironically, when I finally decide to take a stand and report these people to the construction companies, the workers just seem to stop. Oh well. On this very special morning, with all the roaming ballerinas, I got a panic attack, or several little ones. Out of the blue, the shortness of breath begins. I feel anxious, scared, and hopeless. My eyes begin to tear up and I can’t stop. I try to calm myself by thinking of beautiful gardens but it doesn’t help. I go into the City Chow café and finally reach some serenity. The cashier asks if I want my corn muffin toasted. The question at the moment seemed odd to me. Corn muffins are eaten toasted? I never heard of such a thing. Well, I have heard of such a thing, I just haven’t seen anyone eat one like that in years or even mention it. I guess the regular cashier saw the confused look on my face and rushed to aid her colleague. She packed my muffin as I normally like it. I paid my bill. Off I went. As I step outside into the cruel New York City streets, the panic attack commences. I thought I was over this. Obviously I wasn’t. I try to calm myself once again, and again, nothing happened. I’m now at the lobby elevators. The panic is still there. I reach the office. The panic is still there. I get to my desk. The panic begins to subside. I turn on my computer. The panic is still there. I go to the bathroom to wash myself. The panic begins to go away.